Back! And new Journal

Yes I am finally back, and I also did a clean up all the crap in this blog.... Anyways I will continue posting my writing works here, and I do have a new one.

This one is called "The Endless Search" and was written recently

Upon my consciousness I seek the source of this feeling... Which delivers me a sudden sensation of despair and of cluelessness that leads me to the fatuous desire of consuming my own soul. Yet, I have the impression that I lack something; that something is supposed to be surrounding me... Be it my sanity? Perhaps in my search for awareness I came upon the thin line between reality and fiction. I may not tell when this sensation started, for as long as I can remember it has been with me, and it is following my every move.

No matter where my face is turned to, no matter whose face I gaze upon... No thoughts I have but the imagery of my own death, yet no reason I may find... For my life has been nothing but the life desired by all. I do not recall any moment where I could deeply blame myself for betraying my conscious. Yet why does this feeling of guilt haunts me? Moment by moment I feel as I am drifting towards complete apathy and in my absence everything will interact flawlessly; my lack of presence means nothing to no one but myself. As I speak these words, life loses it's meaning... Minute after minute Death becomes my desired maid...

As I lay my head down trying to get rid of all of these morbid thoughts (which makes me wonder if I still carry a human soul) I come upon the conclusion that life is nothing but a long and painful wait, until the day that my dear Death will come and embrace me, and finally all the pain will cease...